We put your brother in time out because he was being too rough with you. It’s doesn’t help when you giggle or go over to sit with him while he is in time out. Don’t get me wrong, it’s cute. But it sends mixed signals and makes it hard for mommy to keep a straight face. Further defiance will force me to step away leaving you to fend for yourself.
Let’s face it… Motherhood isn’t glamorous. We aren’t perfect, unless you are a sanctimommy, then you can do no wrong. And during the course of any given day our feelings for our kids can go from wanting to rip our hair out to not being able to give enough kisses. The good days are great and the bad days end in wine, lots of wine. We have been house bond for quite awhile settling into our new life in Canada and I began to notice a few common thoughts I have daily.
10 – Holy hell kids are hard, like freakin hard.
9 – I will pay someone $25 to change whatever is in that diaper.
8 – Okay, it’s time to stop FB stalking all my friends who don’t have kids.
7 – I just want to sleep for 5 consecutive hours, just once.
6 – Hoooowwwwww can you possibly still be hungry for more food?!?
5 – How can I possibly look you straight in the eye and scold you for something I think is hilarious?!?
4 – Where is the duct tape, I won’t use it, I just want to have it in sight.
3 – How the heck do I hide my indulgences in the car now that P is forward facing….?
2 – Wait I’m confused… Are you Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde? I can’t seem to keep up.
1 – Wait till I tell your first relationship what you just did!
Please tell me I am not alone in some of these. Have any to add?
I started this series over a year ago in hopes of opening up a little more about my experiences as a mother. Although I like to make this blog a happy place, motherhood often throws us curve balls. We are emotionally and physically challenged daily and sometimes at the end of the day we go to sleep with regrets. Did I yell too much? Did they not get enough attention? Why did I let them eat chicken nuggets? The truth is, we aren’t perfect and that’s okay! Life isn’t suppose to be Pinterest perfect. We can focus on those moments, but sometimes we need to reflect on the outtakes to get the full picture of motherhood. This series is about being real. Sometimes controversial. But never sugar coated.
I’ve always known I was a little, okay maybe a lot, OCD. I like things tidy and organized with a place for everything. It’s a little ironic since I am also very crafty and was an art major. I always found a way to keep my paint pallets spotless and paints organized carefully. I have mastered the skill of multitasking and finding ways to organize things come easy so it doesn’t occupy too much time.
Having kids has certainly challenged me more than I could ever imagine. While our house is tidy and organized most of the time I’ve had to give a little and learn to let things go. Over the last 3 1/2 years I have been diligent to make sure all the pieces to toys were accounted for. That larger toys remained inside so they didn’t get dirty. That clothes were carefully looked over before washed to remove every single stain, no matter what it took. It is all very time consuming but I wanted to be able to resell it.
Earlier this week we were at the playground and I had a little epifiny…. I realized that a photo like this was worth much more than the $3 I would get from a consignment sale. That life should be more about getting dirty, even if it means ruining that favorite shirt. And that I can never get these moments back once they are gone.
Iv’e been dealing with an internal battle lately about Caity sleeping in our bed.
It’s so easy to compare her to Parker who was taking 2 three hour naps a day and sleeping 12 hours at night in his crib without much effort putting him down. He was and still is a very good sleeper. I knew I was lucky but didn’t realize how much until Caity was born. I have to keep telling myself she is a different baby. Different personality, wants, and different needs.
I go back and forth almost every day between loving it and wishing she would just sleep on her own. I can’t put into words how amazing it feels to have her sleep next to me. She loves to cuddle and throughout the night she will make sure I am still there by putting her hand or foot on me. It’s even more adorable to watch her scoot over to Rob to cuddle.
On the other hand it’s been over 11 months since I have actually had a full uninterrupted night sleep. It has also taken a small toll on Rob and my relationship. It’s nothing we can’t adapt to, just makes it harder to connect and talk. I am also limited in the amount of time I have in the evenings to do work. Some nights she falls into a deep sleep and I can slip away for a few hours. Other nights she notices the minute I walk away.
On a particularly hard day when I had a lot to get done and Caity wanted me next to her for nap one of my favorite songs came on and it was a good reminder that It Won’t Be Like This For Long. I started thinking about the fact that Caity will only be taking naps for a few years and then she will head off to school. Even at night she won’t want to sleep in our bed forever. Even if she does for a few years that is such a small fraction of her life.
I know one day I will miss it. I will want it back. I will remember all the snuggles we had. I will not remember all the work I didn’t get done. And I will notremember the sleepless nights.
I will remember laying next to this. So calm. So peaceful. So innocent. So precious.
Although moms nowadays have more resources than our mothers did, it’s still hard. Sometimes not even all the gadgets in the world can make a hard day easier. The kiddos fell asleep during our trip to my parents house this past weekend and I found myself wondering what my ultimate wish list would be to make motherhood a little easier. Here is what I came up with.
Drive Thru Convenient Store
Although we have been using the Harris Teeter Express service (amazing I might add) there are days when only a jumbo fountain Diet Dr Pepper and chocolate can get me through. Unfortunately, loading and unloading two kids TWICE for a chocolate bar is more hassle than it’s worth. Having a local drive through to grab a few small things here and there would be pretty much awesome.
My parents try to visit at least every other month to see the kids. When our schedule allows we try to visit them. It’s about a five hour trip not accounting for stops or traffic. Oh boy would it be nice to be able to load the kids in the car, hope in the back and spend those five hours sleeping, mombooking, or watching a movie with the kids. Heck, I would even take a chauffeur on the average day when we are running around completing errands and such.
It’s a hard balance between wanting your kids to eat healthy well balanced diets and having the time to actually plan, prep, and make those meals. Being able to sit down to a well balanced and yummy dinner without any of the work would be simply amazing. Also having a chef around to fulfill those late night cravings during pregnancy. While I am at it, lets add a dishwasher in there as well!
We decided to cloth diaper for environmental reasons and to save money. I don’t mind taking care of the diaper laundry but some weeks I can’t say I would mind if someone washed, folded, and left them on my door step like the old days.
It’s inevitable, kids get sick. During one of our first appointments the pediatrician said, “we are here to comfort the parents”. Although the kids are rarely sick, I do take them to the pediatrician to rule things out. I also took both kids last month together for their well checks. Yikes, it is not something I will ever do again. It was a HOT mess. Having a doc on call to stop by the house for a quick check or their well visits would be glorious.
I’m sure as the kids get older my wish list will change but for the time being these are it! Now it’s your turn! What would be some things on your wish list?